To Tell.... oR NOT.

At no point this week did I threaten to dismember any or all of my children ('cept Livi- she still likes me) if they messed up my clean kitchen. How do you expect me to keep my Mother of the Year title if I'm behaving badly?


I did not get exceedingly angry when the STUPID AT&T dvr hard drive DIED in the last 3 FREAKING MINUTES of the Rockets game against the STUPID LOSER LAKERS. I knew they weren't gonna win.... I mean...... I heard that from my friend who's a major heathen and actually watches things like basketball games on Sunday. Like I would ever do that. Pu-lease.


BTW- wanna hear a good joke? OK.... so here ya go....

Why does Kobe Bryant wear goggles during nookie???????? to keep the mace out of his eyes.
HA! I love that one!

I most certainly did not at any time- especially any time in the last week- lose my key ring that has my car key, house key, mail key, office key, and church keys on it. I'm totally responsible and I know that if any of those keys were to end up in the wrong hands, the consequences would not be even a little bit cool. Good thing I didn't lose 'em, huh?


I didn't want to (very politely) flip Matt off when he wrinkled his nose up and asked (with great disdain, I might add...) if the Killers concert I'm going to see in September was the very same tour I just saw and that he couldn't BELIEVE that I would pay money to go see the exact same songs again. He just doesn't understand that my love is pure. I was gonna go see Stacy anyway... might as well see my boyfriend while I'm in Utah, right? Makes sense to me. I mean let's just think about this for a second....he's on a world tour- sacrifices MUST occasionally be made. And yes Matt, I will say it again... to me, you are truly like the brother I never wanted. I always value your opinion. Especially when it comes to B-Flow.... 'cuz you're not jealous. Not even a little bit.


I didn't, at any point this week seriously consider scheduling a sleep study so I could sleep in a bed ALL by myself and not be disturbed by little people who need to be "cuddled real bad" because there's a monster in the closet AND the bathroom. Let's save the sleep studies for people who really need them, shall we? The fact that insurance will totally cover it isn't really a valid excuse. It's just not.


OK, so I have really revealed way too much of my awesomeness this week. At all times, I really do try to keep in the back of my mind those who may not be as fortunate or dedicated to the "good fight"as I am.

Please don't be a hater.
It took 25 long years to get this cool.

OK fine.... 25 1/2....sheesh........ can't a girl fudge on her age even a little bit????